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Jenny Pan

My Faith Journey

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Growing Up Between Worlds
 

I am a first-generation Chinese American, born in Taiwan and raised in New York.

I speak fluent Mandarin and remain deeply connected to my cultural roots. But my early years were filled with tension between identities—being “too much” in some spaces, “not enough” in others.

I immigrated to the U.S. at age 9, where I experienced years of bullying and isolation due to emotional, physical, and learning differences.

Like many children of the '80s, my ADHD went undiagnosed—but its impact was significant.

Complex Trauma and Searching for Belonging
 

My cultural and neurological differences led to struggles that followed me into adulthood.

I longed to belong and to feel seen—often searching for meaning in the wrong places.

My first marriage lasted 15 years and was later understood to be a neurodiverse relationship, as my former husband was diagnosed with autism post-divorce. The marriage brought both deep connection and painful disconnection.
 

Walking through divorce as a Christian woman felt lonely and, at times, shame-filled. Yet through prayer, therapy, and the support of DivorceCare, God brought healing, restoration, and new life.
 

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” – Psalm 147:3
 

“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Psalm 34:18
 

These verses were my lifeline through the darkest valleys. Jesus became my ultimate healer and counselor—calling me to therapy, showing me the hope that still existed, and surrounding me with community when I felt most alone.

A New Chapter: Family, Faith, and Freedom
 

Today, I’m remarried and building a blended family with my husband, my two teenagers (ages 14 and 12), and two adult stepchildren (ages 20 and 18).

It’s not seamless—but it’s full of love, grace, and growth. Our family is real, alive, and continually evolving.
 

One of my favorite Christian artists, Tauren Wells, says it best:
 

“God’s not done with you—even when you’re lost and it’s hard and you’re falling apart…”
 

I’m here to tell you—God is not done with you, your marriage, or your family.
 

“Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 1:6

The Impact of Therapy on My Life
 

Therapy didn’t just help me—it transformed me.

My therapist was like breath to lungs that had forgotten how to breathe. I was finally able to grieve, heal, rediscover my voice, and learn to show up fully for myself and my loved ones.

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Becoming a therapist was a leap of faith. I wanted to give others the same compassion and clarity I received when I was hurting.

It’s been one of the most meaningful and joyful choices I’ve ever made.

How Christian Counseling can Transform Your Relationship
 

I used to wonder, “What’s wrong with me?”

As a therapist, I now reframe that question: “What happened to you?”

So much of our relational struggle comes from pain, unmet needs, and old patterns—not brokenness in who we are.
 

Christian counseling integrates psychology and theology. Psychology offers tools for communication, attachment, and conflict resolution. Theology grounds the work in covenant love, forgiveness, and purpose.

 

In some couples, one (or both) partners may also be carrying the weight of cultural expectations, family loyalty, or identity struggles.
 

That’s been my lived experience—and it’s a frequent reality in the clients I serve.

 

That is why I offer individuals and couples in Mandarin (and Chinglish) - to provide a space that feels more natural and deeply connecting for clients with multicultural backgrounds.


Together, these elements provide a redemptive path forward.
 

“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” – Ecclesiastes 4:12
 

I help couples:
 

  • Understand why they chose each other
     

  • Communicate with empathy and clarity
     

  • Heal childhood wounds through attachment work
     

  • Name wants and needs without shame
     

  • Set healthy boundaries and expectations
     

  • Reignite intimacy, playfulness, and connection
     

  • Enjoy God’s gift of sexual intimacy without shame

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Helping Couples with Sexual Intimacy
 

God designed sex to be joyful, sacred, and mutual.

But many Christian couples carry shame, guilt, or confusion around sexuality—often shaped by misinterpretation, silence, or trauma.
 

I offer a biblically grounded, trauma-informed, and attachment-based approach to sexual intimacy that includes:
 

  • Psychoeducation about the sexual response cycle and desire differences
     

  • Reframing sex as a sacred act of connection (Song of Songs, Genesis 2:25)
     

  • Naming and dismantling shame-based beliefs
     

  • Exploring each partner’s unique experiences with safety and compassion
     

  • Using models like EFT and Imago to deepen emotional and sexual intimacy

Christian Counseling and Divorce Recovery
 

Divorce can shatter your sense of identity, faith, and hope.

Christian counseling offers a place to grieve with dignity, heal with compassion, and rediscover your God-given worth.
 

As someone who has walked this road, I offer trauma-informed therapy rooted in grace. I also draw on my experience as both a participant and leader of DivorceCare, where I found life-giving support.
 

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” – Galatians 6:2
 

God can make beauty from ashes. That’s not a cliché—it’s my lived experience. Through prayer, clinical tools, and community, I’ve seen restoration unfold.

Parenting with Faith in a Traditional or Blended Family
 

Whether you are parenting in a traditional or blended family, the goal is not perfection—it’s faithfulness.

Children need safe, respectful relationships just as much as love and guidance.
 

As a former single mom, now raising teens and supporting adult stepchildren, I understand the complexity of family dynamics.

I work with parents to:
 

  • Build secure attachments with children and teens
     

  • Respect autonomy while maintaining connection
     

  • Model grace and forgiveness as a couple
     

  • Develop blended family rhythms that reflect everyone’s love languages
     

  • Stay grounded in God’s strength, not performance
     

Step-parenting, in particular, requires humility and servant-hearted patience. I offer guidance for how to lead with care, not control—and how to allow love and respect to grow naturally.

Books That Shape My Practice
 

  • Getting the Love You Want – A Guide for Couples by Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt

  • The Space Between: The Point of Connection by Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt

  • Changes That Heal and How People Grow by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend

  • Boundaries in Marriage by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend

  • The Meaning of Marriage by Pastor Tim Keller

  • The New Rules of Marriage – What You Need to Know to Make Love Work by Terrence Real 

  • A Celebration of Sex by Dr. Douglas Rosenau

  • Authentic Human Sexuality – An Integrated Christian Approach by Judith Balswick and Jack Balswick

Modalities
 

  • Biblical Counseling - Scripture application and prayers

  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) 

  • Gottman Method for Couples 

  • Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) & Attachment Work 

  • Parenting, Co-Parenting, Blended Family Therapy and Coaching

  • Divorce Coaching and Collaborative Divorce Work 

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Education
 

  • M.A. Marriage and Family Therapy, Western Seminary

  • B.S. Finance & Accounting, New York University
     

License & Employment Info
 

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